a sad but true story: i've apparently had a faulty harddrive all this time and didn't know.. until a couple weeks ago when my harddrive failed. here's the sad part; i lost everything and had to pay $300 to get a new hd when all i wanted was to keep my old one. i've been rebuilding my computer from the ground up the past couple weeks with all the ol' apps and such. thank god so much info is saved online now.. all i really lost that is irreplaceable was tax info and credit report pdfs, that and my work resume which had names dates that i can now only guess at. is this a pity party? no. well, not unless you are rich and want to give me money. that'll help. lots.
ps, i'm still on the job search. i have an interview, and some prospects, but nothing yet set in stone.

Workshops last week at Ripley-Grier were pretty sweet, and I for one had no idea that studio was plopped there on eight like that. I apparently have a lot to learn about NY city. Granted, I don't live there, but a couple more years.. The OCU alums are amazing, and I can't wait to be one. Our network is pretty unbeatable and I'm proud to tell the world where I got my education [well, my BM that is.. we don't talk about the AA from, well, that other school.) Lies, I kid. Dean was a part of my education as well, I will not neglect the little underdog school. Besides, they're long over due for some noteable alums.. I think my graduating class is going to have to work on that.
The moral I learned from last week though, was that a. I've improved imensely over the past year, b. I've been told I have what it takes to be a working actor, and c. NY is a crazy place to live in and I'm even more anxious to get started. These are all good things. Of course I had my share of painful critiques, but such is required for growth. Really, this is a checkpoint which I can look back on in a couple years to see how much I grew. I wasn't hell-bent on being on Broadway, but now that I know about myself and New York, I'm pretty sure I now am. Bring it.

I feel like the ball is starting to roll here, and that's a very exciting prospect.
Speaking of vague statements.. I'm brought back to the days in middle school when we'd put cryptic away messages up on instant messenger, in hopes that someone specific would understand the secret coded message, and all would end happily ever after with marraige and a picket fence. You know what I'm talking about.. such as secret confessions of your love with lyrics to the latest big love ballad hit. What's more, is that you would type it with the most creative font and style you could. "oNcE i WaS aFrAiD i WaS pEtRiFiEd..." or you would be oh so romantic and give them a virtual rose "to the absolute love of my life: @>~~~" I mean, wow, can it get any better than that? What an ideal gift, so creative too. Personally, I'd prefer a real rose. True, once the initial shock of receiving it wears off you just throw it in a vase and watch it wilt for a week.. but it seems a bit more thoughtful, no? There was also the truck.. the one you could write whatever little message you wanted on the side.. and it always came with messages like "you've been hit by the ugly truck. send this message to 4.6 billion people or you will always be ugly and all your cats will die terrible and chocolate-y deaths."
Speaking of 4.6 billion, what about McDonalds these days!? The "4.6 billion served" (or however many it is now) at some point was changed to "4.6 billion happily served." Are they sure about that? Because I'm pretty sure that I leave McDonalds with a stomach ache and frustratration over the terrible service. There's no 'happily' in that sentence.. They should drop the 'happily' is all I'm saying.. They've also recently revealed that they fry the french fries in beef lard. Some people seem really shocked by this.. It's McDonalds people, what do you expect? At least you're not a Hindu, or rather, Sanatana-Dharmist, who will now be able to look forward to being reincarnated as a cockroach when they die. Sanatana-Dharmists Happily served.. well, now they have to start that sign over at Zero. The answer is simple folks.. McDonalds is run by the devil, is all. Truly. He simply uses it to fool good religious folk into eating forbidden meat, and then sends them merrily on their way to hell. Go team! I read a play once (or part of one anyway) about how hell is actually just being with people.. not fire and chains, but eternal time spent in a room with particularly annoying people. That sounds pretty bad to me, and I think my version very well may be being stuck behind the counter at McDonalds. Could you imagine asking "would you like fries with that" for the rest of eternity? On the flip side, a great version of heaven would be quitting and walking out of that job, over and over and over for all eternity. You'd get to yell right back to your smelly boss and feel no regret. You could even play practical jokes. I mean, you have all of eternity, so you'd be bound to get creative. Maybe when he falls asleep at his desk, as he does every hour on the hour, dress him up in drag, and snicker as he tries to figure out why customers are laughing at him. The sky's the limit people! That sounds like a lot more fun than just chilling on a cloud, no?

Not gonna lie, it's pretty tough to keep up with the blog. Either I've been really busy, or I haven't found anything worth blogging over lately. I think it's a bit of both. I also think that the soundtrack to Cruel Intentions is (and always has been) awesome and I've been in the right mood to listen to it recently - good stuff.

I love the fine arts, truly. Left to my own devices in a museum I will find a painting that compels me, and I'll simply stare at it for what seems an eternity. Paintings are eternity really.. a moment, in life or fantasy, caught by the eye of the beholder. It's unbelievable really. The truly remarkable works of art aren't just the ones that look pretty, or realistic or even true to life. Some include these, but a really beautiful painting holds more beneath, the best part being that each person who views it will see something different. I mean, it must be a pretty deep question, held in the painting.. 'what should I eat after I leave the museum' isn't exactly the sort of question the painter was probably trying to provoke in you. Or maybe he was.. how am I to know, really. I decided to find a few examples of paintings, in very different styles, to give a glimpse of what I think about when looking at art. The first painting is 'The Piano Lesson' by Matisse (1916.) Any good art connoisseur will tell you that none of your views on the 'deeper meaning' of a painting can be 'wrong.' Therefore, don't go looking up what the artist was trying to convey in these particular paintings and laugh at me when my view is wrong! That would be just, well, lame. So anyway, to me, this isn't just a young boy practicing the piano. That's too simple. Look closely at the music rack, if you read it backwards it says 'player.' Is this boy playing a player piano? A player piano is, in sorts, a self-playing instrument. Perhaps it was just a brand of piano at the time of the painting, but the way I interpret it is that this boy is merely imitating the playing of a piano, he isn't truly playing. Why is this relevant to me and my life? Well, isn't all art just an imitation of life? While the boy has half a face, the woman in the background has none. Is this woman lost in the world of imitation and art wholly, while the boy is only still learning to immerse himself? The statue and ornate railing seem to show the woman's interest in beauty and art, so perhaps she overlooks happily while her young boy learns to create art himself, despite merely imitating it. This next painting, Donna Con Testa di Rose by Dali' Salvador (1935), makes me think heavily of auditions. The woman in red, so elegant, and dare I saw almost perfect, with clipboard in hand looking over the woman with pieced garb. It is so real-life to see a person, not as a face and body, but as a collection of very different parts. A black glove, a red pant leg, a loose white garment hanging... all the while she is being grasped by her own fears and inhibitions, personified, as they wear white gloves. Let's not forget the floral bouquet the woman has atop her shoulders. It's beautiful. Without seeing her face, we see she is a beautiful woman, yet we're trapped in the moment of indecision.. what will the woman in red decide for her? Is the woman in red looking for a woman with a black glove, a wider knee, or perhaps a bouquet with less yellow..? We'll never know, just as the floral woman will never. In the distance is a blank figure, waiting. Perhaps he has already seen the woman in red, or perhaps he is next to. Perhaps he is both. Then the chair beside the woman in red.. it is only an illusion. Is the woman in red then also? What of the red matter wrapped around her waist, could it be she has fears herself, but of a different shape? Despite all of the possibilities, one thing is for sure; the floral woman is not the first, nor the last to be seen by the woman in red. There are always others, and always will be. The last painting I've posted is Narciso by Caravaggio (1599.) Is this man truly only narcistic, or is it something else? Somehow, I don't think so. Look at his face. I see awe, curiosity, fear.. Look closely at his reflection. It's not of his youthful face, but instead, one much older. But if the boy were simply repulsed by this reflection, he would not be caught staring into it for all eternity. Even though he can never move from this position on the ground, it doesn't seem as if he ever will. I think he looks into his reflection so deeply not out of vanity, but out of the eternal quest to know oneself. Who is that he sees staring back at him. It seems to me that this boy is staring at his future. Will he know who and what he is to become, even if it is staring him in the face? Perhaps, But I don't think he does. I don't think he ever will. He will however, immortalized on cavas, stare at his future self for all eternity, yet he will never know what he is to become. I don't believe any of us do. Maybe that's a scary thought, but I try to see it as less menacing. What would we do if we knew what was to become of ourselves? What would make life exciting? How would we look toward tomorrow? What would become of passion?

I took down a post that was here, not that anyone would miss it. In its place I'm writing about something more exciting. When I read, I really read.. generally I end up reading the book in a day because I can never put it down. Today I read 'til the fat girl sings, From an Overweight Nobody to a Broadway Somebody -A Memoir, by Sharon Wheatley. People, it is inspirational and worth the price of admission. I paid $14.95 at Borders for it, but apparently it's even less at Border's website [now part of Amazon.] You pay at least 5 times as much to see a Broadway show, and you can pay this little fee to peer into the life of a Broadway performer. The book did have high expectations, as it was highly recommend to me. It did not disappoint. I feel that I have just a tiny bit more insight into the crazy business I want to get myself into. I also feel enlightened to the story of a fellow human being, which always makes me feel more in touch with this crazy world, and with myself. I realize I have a lot of soul searching to do, and much more of myself to find in these next precious few years. It seems as if my college journey has been far too long, but I'm learning that things truly do happen for a reason and I've needed every minute to continue learning about Andy Fontaine. Will I ever be able to make the kinds of decisions required of me? How far am I willing to go? There's lots to consider. And may I say, that there is nothing better than being forced into investigating the inner workings of yourself. We need to grow - we need to change. We also need to find our flaws, learn to deal with them, unlearn it, relearn it, and someday finally accept them.

A quote, which rings true with me:
"That night, as the house lights dimmed, I sat on the edge of my seat listening to the orchestra play the overture. It sounded so different from my recording, so crisp and exciting, that I felt the hair on my arms stand up. When the curtain went up, and I saw those real-life-kids just like me on that stage, I started to cry-and I didn't stop until the show was over and we were in the car on the way home. It was the most complicated emotion I had ever felt-a mixture of awe, love, magic, longing, and good old-fashioned jealousy. If a person could actually turn green from envy, a hysterical, pudgy, freckled nine-year-old, the color of the Wicked Witch of the West, would have occupied my seat at Oliver that night.
I've heard that show-biz people have it in their blood, and I am here to tell you that during that performance of Oliver, I got a complete show-biz blood transfusion. I cried myself to sleep that night, furious at the injustice of a life that had made me a mere audience member. Never again, I vowed to myself. From that day forward, I was an actress."

This book will make you think. Let it.

I was going to post a Youtube video for this entry [funny commercial from the superbowl], but then stopped and realized that I have already posted two in the past week. What is it about Youtube? People are becoming more and more enthralled with the internet [not that it's a bad thing] but it's really interesting to see how things are progressing. There have been major new innovations that were once the newest fad, and now are just part of everybodys daily routine. Myspace, for example was huge when it was first launched. Now we have facebook [which dare I say, in my opinion, is far superior to Myspace..] and NOW there's Youtube. It's been around for a while, but it never really became too big of a deal until what seems fairly recently. Now I can't go a day on campus without someone telling me to watch 'shoes' or 'candy mountain' or whatever else is floating around. Everyone makes videos and posts in hopes of becoming the new talk of Youtube. I have a theory though. I blame it all on reality TV, and I think it all began on the internet with ebaums world. People saw how crazily infatuated the world is with watching stupid people do stupid shit [especially if it has weird techno music.] Remember Numa Numa? Did you know that became SO popular that someone actually made a flash animation of him singing on American Idle? Yeah, and what's worse; it's saved on my computer. Lame, I know. That was really the first Youtube-like sensation that I can recall, even though it was pre-Youtube, and it wasn't even ON Youtube. I'm sure it is now, if you were to search for it I'm positive you'd find it. So what's next? Well, I have a theory for that too. There were a billion videos of Sadam's assassination posted on Youtube [most of which I'm sure were fake], is that the next internet fad? Watching people die via Youtube? Watching people leave this earth, it's like playing God. It'll be called Deathtube [patent pending]. I can see it all now.. just imagine...And then of course after that the gimmick won't just be that you're PLAYING God, it'll be that you ARE God. You'll be able to control people's lives from an online control center. There'll be buttons like "trip with crack in the sidewalk..." or "explode abode of..." [there'll be lots of fun word play like that.. has a nice ring to it: explode abode.. it's a great marketing strategy for Deathtube actually.] You won't ACTUALLY be able to directly kill anyone though. That would breech lots of contracts, and the patent God has on death. [Obviously.] But if you're lucky, by tripping someone enough, they're bound to get a bad enough concussion that they may not survive. Who knows. The best part of all? Like Youtube, it'll be free, thanks to sponsorship from corporate America. DEATHTUBE [TM] Sponsored by Pepsi - Do the Death Deed while you Do the Dew! [TM]

So insanely funny. Also true. You better believe I will be owning one of these. They're supposedly being released in June. Nice. I'm just hoping that these really do change the cellphone market.

Microsoft Corp is based in Redmond WA, hence the Redmond reference. [It's as non-subtle as Apple could get without actually saying Microsoft.] Back in 2004 at one of Apple's San Francisco conferences promoting the New OS Tiger, this banner was placed to directly poke fun at Microsoft and it's upcoming platform then named Longhorn [since renamed Vista.] I myself am a mac user, and glad to be one. For those who haven't been following the OS saga, Window's Vista looks freakishly like Apple OS X [specifically, 10.4 Tiger] I find it sort of comical, and I don't see any need for macfans to be scared that Microsoft may be taking back the market.. not at all. I see Apple only growing, as it has been. Instead, I look to the addage "imitation is the best form of flattery." It's also the best form of "hah! Microsoft has zero innovation!" I could go through all of the striking similarities, but it's been done.. and done.. and done. So I've instead posted this youtube video, perhaps you've seen it, of a writer at The New York Times speaking on the subject. I hope you sense the sarcasm in it all, but the man has set off on a 3 minute journey to prove once and for all that Micro$oft did NOT copy Apple on this OS. Well, you judge for yourself. I will say though, that if there's any doubt that Windows may have actually one-uped Apple, once Leopard is released there will no longer be any question as to Apple's superiority.Yes, we MacAddicts really DO support our OS. But hey, my Mac has treated me so well.. which is much more than I can say for any of the PC's I've owned. I feel bad for all the PC users who are upgrading to Vista and therefore have to either upgrade EVERYTHING in their CPU, or else get a new computer. Joey is running Tiger on his G3 perfectly. I run it on my G4 and I also have zero problems. I could keep this computer for the next 10 years, easy, without any problems. I, however, am too wowed by new shiny objects, so I'll probably be buying a new Mac before then; not because I need to, but because I will inevitably want to. My 2 year old G4 is already a dinousaur compared with the new Macbooks. 'What, you have an EXTERNAL isight?!' Yes, yes.. But the way I see it, when the next generation of laptops comes out and there's some other huge hardware upgrade, I'll be the first to get one.

I did get my tooth pulled. Yesterday. I didn't count on being out of the count for so long, but I'm beginning to heal and it looks like it was worth it. On the upside, I went to a place called "Dentist Depot" with a train in front of it; and it was themed, as you can imagine. There was even a miniature train running along the ceiling through holes cut into all of the walls. [Pretty much my dream come true as a little kid. It also gave me something non-threatening to look at.] The people there were also very pleasant, and pronounced my home state "Massatusetts." I'm pretty sure there's a 'ch' in there.. but they were so kindly [and had the power to do scary things to my mouth] so I didn't correct them. Aside from the train paraphernalia, they lowered the price of my visit by nearly $100 because a.) I'm a poor college student, b.) I don't have dental insurance and c.) I amused them all by my detailed stories of the mystical land of Massatusetts. I knew my baked-beans-and-tea-party heritage would come in handy..

With the pain involved with a wisdom tooth poking its way further through my gums, I got to thinking about dentists, and why they're so scary. Plus, my boss is in the unpleasant process of oral surgery to correct a problem with a cap. But really now, why are dentists so scary? A lot of people are more scared of dentists than of doctors. Man, I would think a tooth cleaning would be a little less nerve-wracking than having a surgeon cut open your vital organs.. you know, the ones you need to survive.. I know for certain that there are toothless yokels out there who are doing quite fine. How many people do you know walking around without lungs or a large intestine? Anyway, I digress. The dentist. They're usually very nice, at least the ones I've been to. And as a kid, there were always fun Dr. Seuss books and those 3D bead maze things. You know what I'm talking about. As an adult you can read up on the latest celeb gossip, although I prefer reading a little Dr. Seuss myself. [One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish? How does he think of these things?! Complete genius..] Back to the magazines. Let's leave the poor people alone, eh? Imagine if People Magazine did spreads on locals like you and I.. that'd be boring. Who would want to see pictures of Mrs. Thomas coming out of the supermarket in flipflops and a moomoo? [Especially if they were taken from the bushes] or an article about how the guy in apartment 8B divorced his wife of 2 weeks to be with another woman.. [zzz] Well, if that appeals to you I think we should have a 1-on-1 chat about a little thing called gossip. It's bad. [Although down here in the south it's not so much a thing as it is a way of life..] That being said, me being a completely ordinary unfamous guy, if you were taking pictures of me coming out of the supermarket in flipflops and a moomoo from the bushes, be forewarned that I would not hesitate to throw a heavy object in your general direction.. whether I be famous or not. Speaking of heavy objects.. The gym.. My new years resolution this year was to get in better shape. I'm pretty sure that 99% of Americans make that resolution as well. Maybe I'll be in the tiny percentile who actually get off their butts and go to the gym to make it happen. [scoff!] I mean, I'm already one step ahead of most.. I don't have to send a check to a gym, I have a free one right on campus. [By free, I mean included in my overly-inflated tuition] Well, I haven't been yet.. but I keep telling myself that it's too cold to walk over there now.. I'll go when spring hits. So would I rather go to the dentist or the gym? The dentist is just one visit, where as the gym is a long term commitment for not so immediate results. One visit to the dentist equals sparkly teeth. One visit to the gym equals one sweat-soaked shirt and sore tiny biceps. Then again, there is no wait for the gym, but then again you can't get out of work for it either.. No free toothbrush when you go to the gym though... tough decision. I don't know what to choose! I suppose I'd have to go with the gym.. mainly because I don't have dental insurance at present and a free trip to the gym certainly matches my current budget.
So it's the gym. Now I have to go. Dangit. Should I be going to the dentist to check out my wisdom teeth though? I have both lower wisdom teeth in.. and they're oh so slowly growing in. [It's taken over a year for them to just barely break through the gums.] Who decided to call them gums anyway? And why gums with an 's'? When we talk about chewing gum, people would look at you like you're an idiot if you were to add an 's' to make gum plural. "Yeah, I just love chewing my Orbit Bubblemint[tm] Gums. Mmmm!" And yet if you say that your tooth is poking through your gum people would also look at you strangely. Or perhaps they would say "that's a great story.. you should tell that at parties." [with oodles of sarcasm of course.]

I'm not 100% sure, but I think it doesn't matter.

Run, don't walk to the nearest theater, to see it if you haven't already. Dreamgirls. Like you didn't know what I was talking about. It was so hyped up that by the time I was finally able to go to the theaters to see it I didn't think I would end up loving it as much as everyone else. Wrong. Just see it, you'll understand. Good music. Good story. Good insight into this crazy business of entertainment. Good cinematography. Good actors. It's all good people.

And you know what else, Beyonce was better than I was expecting. Good for her. Of course Jennifer Hudson was unbelievable - such is to be expected. The gal has pipes. Dude, art like this really makes me proud to be an entertainer. That's why I train.. ideally, the technique will be there so I can express myself and get across my message. Don't know what it is yet, but it'll come. [gosh I can ramble..] Just see the movie! You won't regret it.

So we've got a gay sheep controversy. We've also got a senate about ready to cut off a President. Let me start with the later.
So you see, with the opposition to Bush's proposal to send 20,000 more troops to Iraq, Bush's approval ratings have fallen as low as Nixon's after the watergate scandal, and those during the Vietnam War. Those aren't good stats for Pres. Pretzel, if you didn't know. There are several proposals floating around Senate right now that would symbolically cut off the President if he sends these troops into the stalemate that is Iraq. For those who have forgotten a thing or two from History and Government, the President (thanks to a bogus bill) is able to make whatever executive decisions regarding warfare that he deems essential. [It's all in the wording..] This means that Senate can oppose this all they want, but they can't really stop it from happening. However, they CAN cut off financial ties to the President. Where do you think Bushie gets his allowance to play his large scale game of Risk [great board game.. very competitive though; be weary.] So the cut off would be merely symbolic, but it certainly gets the message across. All of this, but do we think Bush is going to change his mind? Hell no. As a matter of fact, Vice Pres. "oops I accidentally shot him" said on a CNN interview "It won't stop us." ..It won't stop us.. What WOULD stop them? Perhaps if global warming dramatically hits [like it's due to] the ice caps will melt and flood Prezel and Shotgun out of the White House. Or maybe some angry taxpayers weilding fire and pitch forks will demand change. Or quite possibly, Bushie will choke on another pretzel. Whatever it takes, Senate symbolically cutting off the administration will NOT force a change. Georgie will have it his way. Why? Because, well, he's the President and he wears suits 'n stuff.

Moving on, perhaps to the more shocking bit of news.. A scientist, Charles Roselli, is facing huge controversy over a study about gay sheep. Yes, gay sheep. Somehow, this didn't really surprise me. What DID surprise me is that apparently 8% of rams [male sheeps, smartie pants] prefer to do it with other rams. No scientific fact to back myself up here, but it seems to line up with the 'supposed' percentage of gay humans. Emphasis on the supposed. [When it all comes down to it, aren't all Homo Sapien Sapien's, well, homos? Let's all just get along now then, alright?] a'hem. Back to Roselli.. the man has been recieving oodles of hate mail from animal rights activists and GBLT rights activists alike. Now, I have a vested interest in both of these areas, but could we possibly cut the poor man an iota of slack? I'm not all about cutting open Ram brains to find out what makes them dislike eweginas, but I do acknowledge that science has been doing things like this forever. Just google "science and animal rights" and you'll see what I mean. This doesn't make it okay. However, I'm just saying it's nothing to write to the press about - yet one has. But what I do NOT understand is the involvement of the Gay Rights activists. Did I not get the gay-memo about this? Maybe hotmail is blocking it. [Microsoft.. they would.] Since when does Gay Rights include sheep? Let's not feed the anti-gay fire here.. Regardless, I don't see the relevance. We have rams that like rams.. Can't we just rejoice in that we have scientific facts to explain to skeptics that homosexuality DOES occur in nature.. I don't know people.. pick your battles. But back [again] to Mr. Roselli, there was massive misrepresentation in the media about his experiments and his intent. There was talk about him trying to find a gay vaccine of sorts, by probing these sheep. Who comes up with this stuff? Maybe it was Bush - Hell, maybe he's trying to find a way to clone gay sheep so he can send them to be killed in Iraq. I mean, he doesn't want Gay HUMANS in the armed forces..

Bottom line:

gay sheep are OKAY. Sure, let's learn more about them, but not kill the poor buggers.
and
George W. Bush is, was, and always will be a four year old. Thank god for our balanced system of government.

A good friend of mine is going to be coming to OCU in the fall. I'm psyched. She's all set too, because she's got insider info and this is going to MAKE her dreams come true! I'm excited for her, hardcore.

Only thing is, she just doesn't know that she's coming yet. But I do.

The New Dorm is the talk of OCU right now, and after living with three inch cockroaches, moldy air, cold water and weird rust pouring out of the shower wall Joe and I have decided enough is enough and we're moving into the new dorm in the fall. Now, it's still under construction so there's no guarantee that it will be done by then. But then again, there are a lot of students already signed up who will be mighty angry if it's not. Regardless, I don't think living off campus would work next year, so the beautiful new dorm is the next best option. It does cost more than the regular dorms, of course, but each room has it's own bathroom, balcony, FULL SIZED BED and kitchenette, with a shared living space and an assigned covered parking spot.There is going to be a mini-supermarket inside the dorm... aka I can walk in my slippers down the hall when it's ice-storming outside (like it is right now) to get a gallon of milk and carton of cookie dough ice cream. I can also STORE my milk and icecream in the fridge [which I can not at present.] Plus, the dorm is totally co-ed. Not by room, so I can't live with a girl, but a girl can live right next door to me. That's pretty sweet. Anyway, aside from that, the rooms are grouped as singles, doubles, or quads. This is a corner double, which would be the ideal. I suppose Joe and I could go into a quad with 2 other guys, but we'd have to find a couple friends to do that with, and I'm not quite sure of who is and isn't planning on living in the new dorm. Joe and I need to go to res life and sign up for a room, and then I can rejoice. Until then, it's just an idea. So this is the new dorm NOW. Still a bunch of concrete. But they're on floor 2 of 4, so we're getting there. Look carefully and you'll see one of the elevator shafts rising up in the sky towards nowhere. Sort of fun. You can also see the Cokesbury Apartments across the street. The new dorm will be even nicer, and it will be considered part of tuition, which is sweet. No paying by the month. I also hear that the furniture in the new dorm will be leather and really nice. The furniture in Cokesbury is that nasty multicolored boxy 90's furniture. You know what I'm talking about.. like the stuff at cheap motels and at your grandma's place. This could could be a vicious lie, but then again, anything is better than the grandma furniture. It'll save me $33.99 [plus tax] and a trip to Target to buy a tacky couch slipcover.

More W&G quotes? Well, if you say so!

Ben Doucette: Let's talk wine. Karen, you have any preference?
Karen: Honey, I'd suck the alcohol out of a deodorant stick, so you're asking the wrong gal.

Karen: Grace, that blouse hurts like a hangover.

Stranger at the Gay Parade: You see, your drag name is the name of the first pet you had and the name of the first street you lived on.
Karen: So mine would be uh... ShuShu Fontanna.
[they all laugh and clap]
Karen: That's hysterical. Jackie what's yours?
Jack: [upset] Glen 125th.

[Jack doesn't believe that Bonnie, Eliot's mother, is gay]
Jack: No, it can't be... say something lesbionic..
Bonnie: Home Depot.
Jack: K.D. Lang you are a lesbian!

Cher: Don't talk to me about rejection, okay? Look how many times I've gone down in flames. Remember, I LOST the Oscar for 'Moonstruck'.
Jack: But you WON the Oscar for 'Moonstruck'.
Cher: And don't you forget it.

[Grace has to get her blood drawn by a very young nurse]
Grace: Whoa, whoa, her? Isn't there someone who's a little more... experienced? Someone who didn't drive in on a Big Wheel?
Nurse Trainee Pittman: Oh, I don't drive. I keep taking the test over and over, but I'm all, "This is hard."

Will: [about Stan] He didn't find out about your affair, did he?
Karen: No. Thank God my boobs are like arms. I was able to distract Stan with one of them while the other one motioned for Lionel to get out the door.

Jack: But there's always a lot of rich, old gay guys at those things looking for younger gay guys to take care of. You know, the way Dick Cheney takes care of George Bush.

Jack: Heterosexual marriage is just wrong. I mean, if God had meant men and women to be together, he would have given them both penises.

Grace: Sweetie, are you gonna be okay? You sure you don't want me to stick around in case Kevin comes back? You know I'm a good biter. I once bit a jump rope in half.
Will: Why?
Grace: [pause] What d'you mean, "why"?


Karen: They're trying to make gay people straight? Good Lord! Don't they know what that'll do to the fall line?

Jack: Today is an important day for you. You're not just losing a friend, you're losing a hag.
Will: She is not my hag. She's just a single woman who used to be in love with me and who hasn't spent a day away from me since college.
[sighs]
Will: She's been a good hag.

Karen: [in a luandromat] What is this place? It's pretty.
[starts to tap on a washing machine]
Karen: Where are all the fishes?
Grace: No Karen this is a laundramat, normal people wash their clothes and wear them again.
Karen: Well poor people are just plain clever.

Will: Where's all the Chinese food?
Grace: Oh, I opened it up and started to eat it and then I noticed a hair in it. So I called the restaurant to complain and they were like "Well, how do you know its not your hair?" and I said "Well, I know what my hair tastes like." Anyway, I got so disgusted, I threw it all out.
Will: You ate all of it, didn't you?
Grace: Yes, I did.

Barry: I can't go out with the guy. He's an all star, I'm barely in the minors.
Will: Sports again? What did I tell you to say when you have thoughts like that?
Barry: Oh, yeah. Liza, Judy, Barbara, Bette, these are names I shant forget.

Jack: Will, have you totally forgotten how to speak our language? 'Running late' is gay for 'I'm blowing you off.'
Will: Really. What's gay for 'get out'?
Jack: That would be 'good morning.'

[Karen is running a scam with her con-artist mother, and she is wearing a sweatshirt that says 'I Loves Me Kitty']
Jack: Oh, my God, I have that same shirt! Except, um, mine has a big rooster on it, and it says 'I love me big, red - '
Will: Jack!

Karen: [Grace enters wearing a cow-print skirt] Woah. Got skirt?

[Owen has just interrupted Jack's solo]
Jack: Uh, excuse me. As Aretha said to Gloria, Celine, Shania, and Mariah during Divas Live...
[in an Aretha voice]
Jack: "Are you trippin'? No one interrupts the Queen of Soul, bitch. OK?"
Owen: Well, I believe she also said, "Hey, Cuba, Canada, Cowgirl, Crazy, get out of my light and away from my snacks, bitch."

Kevin Bacon: When the stalkers leave, it's the first sign that your career is slipping. Little tidbit I picked up from Val Kilmer.
Will: Wait, you did a movie with Val Kilmer?
Kevin Bacon: No, but Val was in "Top Gun" with Tom Cruise and Tom was in "A Few Good Men" with me.
[pause]
Kevin Bacon: Huh, that was a short one.

Jack: [Holding up a lock of long, red hair] Guess what this is.
Will: Grace used your shower again?
Jack: One of Bernadette Peters' curls. She was standing in front of me at Duane Reade. Luckily, I was buying a pair of toenail clippers. Now I have hair from Bernadette Peters, Betty Buckley, and Idina Menzel. All I need is Patti LuPone and my Broadway diva wig will be complete!

[A WAITER SITS PATTI LUPONE AT A TABLE NEXT TO JACK'S. JACK AND PATTI HAVE THEIR BACKS TO EACH OTHER. JACK IS CLEANING HIS LAP AND SWEATER WITH A NAPKIN.]
WAITER: Miss LuPone, I just wanna say I saw you in Evita when I was 16. I came out by intermission.
PATTI: I hear that a lot. Sometimes I think I'm personally responsible for the West Village.
WAITER: By the way, you look fabulous.
[JACK IS DYING TO LOOK.]
PATTI: Thanks. My hair's a little long, I need to get it cut.
[JACK PICKS UP A BUTTER KNIFE. HE TURNS AROUND AND LOOKS AT PATTI'S HAIR AND MOVES IN WITH THE KNIFE, WHEN WILL RETURNS.]
WILL: Sorry.
[JACK QUICKLY TURNS AROUND AND PICKS UP SOME BUTTER WITH HIS KNIFE, AND BEGINS SPREADING IT ON HIS HAND. WILL LOOKS AT JACK STRANGELY.]
WILL: This is really, really sweet of you to do, Jack. Thank you.
[JACK WIPES HIS HAND ON HIS NAPKIN.]
JACK: Well, I'm happy to. There's nothing more important to me than you, Patti-- Fatty-- Will!
WILL: Are you--are you okay?
JACK: Yeah, I'm fine. I'm perfect. So heartbreak and sorrow, go.
PATTI: Oh, no, my earring.
[PATTI BEGINS LOOKING AROUND THE FLOOR.]
WILL: [QUIETLY TO JACK] Oh, my God. Is that Patti LuPone?
[PATTI GETS ON HER HANDS AND KNEES AND CRAWLS ON THE FLOOR TO FIND HER EARRING.]
JACK: No, I don't think so. Heh heh.
WILL: I really think it is.
JACK: Really?
[JACK LOOKS DOWN. PATTI IS ON HER HANDS AND KNEES NEXT TO HIS TABLE. JACK GRABS HER SHIRT AND PULLS HER HEAD UP FOR A SECOND, THEN PUTS HER BACK DOWN.]
JACK: Oh, what do you know, it is.
[PATTI FINDS HER EARRING, SHE STARTS TO GET UP, BUT WHILE STILL KNEELING NEXT TO JACK'S CHAIR...]
PATTI: [TO JACK] I'm sorry. My head was practically in your lap. So...do I get the part?
[PATTI SMILES AND STANDS UP, STRAIGHTENS HER DRESS AND SITS DOWN..]
WILL: Jack. What are you doing? You've been trying to track down Patti LuPone ever since you came home with that clump of hair from Bea Arthur and finished your Golden Girls' wig.
JACK: William. Now for the last time, nothing can distract me from you. Now please continue.
[THE WAITER HAS BROUGHT OVER A TRAY WITH A TEACUP AND A POT OF TEA FOR PATTI.]
WAITER: [TO PATTI] Um, I hate to ask this, and I feel really awkward.
PATTI: Oh, it's okay. I know. You want me to sing "Don't Cry For Me, Argentina."
WAITER: Well, it's my birthday.
PATTI: I would love to. But I don't wanna be rude. I'll just ask these gentlemen if they don't mind.
[PATTI TURNS AROUND IN HER CHAIR TO ADDRESS JACK AND WILL.]
PATTI: Excuse me.
[JACK IGNORES HER, BUT IT'S OBVIOUSLY VERY HARD ON HIM. PATTI TAPS ON HIS SHOULDER.]
PATTI: Hello?
[JACK LOOKS AROUND, NERVOUSLY JIGGLING HIS TEACUP AND SAUCER.]
WILL: Jack, Patti LuPone is trying to get your attention.
PATTI: Would you mind if I sang?
JACK: Shut up, Patti LuPone! Shut your brassy, magnificent trap! I don't wanna hear you sing. I don't wanna cut your hair. And I certainly don't wanna hear you singing while I'm cutting your hair! Got it?! Now I'm talking to my best friend, so stand back, Buenos Aires!
[JACK FANS HIMSELF WITH HIS NAPKIN AND PATS HIS FOREHEAD.]
[PATTI TURNS AROUND IN HER CHAIR.]
PATTI: [TO THE WAITER] People either love me, or they hate me.
WILL: I don't believe you just did that. You spurned a Broadway legend for me.
JACK: Well, I wanted to prove to you that I really care about you, Will.
WILL: And you did.
JACK: Really?
WILL: Yes. And thank you. Now come on. We've got a diva to scalp.
JACK: Thank you, Will. I just hope she's not a screamer like that prissy Rue McClanahan.

[THE WAITER IS AT THE PIANO. JACK, WILL, AND PATTI LUPONE ARE STANDING AT THE PIANO. THE WAITER BEGINS PLAYING "DON'T CRY FOR ME ARGENTINA" FROM THE MUSICAL "EVITA".]
PATTI: [SINGING] Don't cry for me, Argentina. The truth is I never left you.
JACK: [SINGING] All through my wild days, my mad existance...
WILL: [SINGING] I kept my promise...
PATTI: [SINGING] Don't keep your distance.
[WILL PATTI SMILES AT WILL, JACK HOLDS UP A PAIR OF SCISSORS AND MOVES IN TO HER HAIR.]

I had a crazy dream the other night, that Joey and I were in the costume shop and one of the seamstresses told us she wanted to give us tattoos. Joe was all for it, and i decided reluctantly that it would be okay. She did a small tattoo on Joey's back, which he really liked, then it was my turn. She was supposed to tattoo a sticker that I gave her onto my back. It was only about an inch wide, but as she tattooed she made it much larger. I stopped to look at it and realized it covered my entire back. I started crying and freaking out.. "I can't have a tattoo covering my whole back!! Oh my god what have I DONE?!!?!" I was horrified. I started hitting myself on the head asking myself why I could be so stupid as to do it when I didn't really want to in the first place.. it was permanent and now it would ALWAYS be there.. a big ugly, half-drawn tattoo. I felt like my life was over.
Well, thankfully, I woke up and felt a massive wave of relief.

What was THAT all about??

Now I'm utterly confused as to why a sweet little Asian seamstress was in my dream as a careless tattoo artist, and now I am also completely petrified of getting a tattoo. Ever.

These silly Oklahomans are all distraught over a few inches of ice and snow. The poor blokes don't know what snow IS. I'd love for them to experience a good 'ol noreaster so they understand that what's going on down here is nothing. We've had two ice storms thus far this winter, which everyone here says is unheard of [global warming is gonna get us all i tell you!] I will admit that the ice is pretty dangerous to drive on, but Oklahoma doesn't believe in plowing. It must not snow enough for it to be worth having them. Well, regardless, the roads are covered in a good 2 inches of solid ice everywhere because it was never taken care of.
Everyone on campus has been complaining that classes weren't canceled this week because of the snow this past weekend. I decided to dig up a photo of a noreaster from home. Ya, there are cars under there. I should print this off and show all these silly Okies what real snow is. [And if I recall correctly, I think we possibly had one day off from school from the storm in the photo.] We got 2 inches of snow here right before winter break and had 2 days off from school. Insanity.

Some Will & Grace Quotes. Probably my favorite sitcom [and by probably i mean absolutely]- funny as hell..

Karen: [to Gillian the intern] Hi, honey. Sit down!
Gillian: What's going on, what's happening, what's this all about?
Karen: I've got something tough to tell you. Uh, I'm fabulous, okay? I'm an incredible dresser, I've got buckets of money, I'm a hoot and a half, and I've got a killer rack. Do you get what I'm saying?
Gillian: Not really.
Karen: Honey, you're not me, and you never will be.
Gillian: [pointing to her chest] Is it the rack?
Karen: [laughing and shaking her head] "It's a big part of it. Now, you're never going to be me, but, you got a good chance to be Grace, and that's nothing to sneeze at, honey, you shouldn't throw it away so quickly."
Gillian: But Grace, she's just not us.
Karen: Bup-bupbupbupbupbup, watch your mouth, or I'll wash it out with cheap vodka. That's my little girl you're talking about. Now, Grace is a damn good role model. She's bright, she's successful, she's the worst dresser in the whole wide world, she's talented and I look up to her. Honey, why else would I be here?
Gillian: You told me it's because you hate being home with Stan and the kids.
Karen: [laughing and shaking her head] It's a big part of it.
Gillian: Hey, can I still use the word "honey"?
Karen: What? Ohhhhhhhh no.

Jack: [to Will over the phone before Will comes out] Well, if you're wanting to make muskrat love with your girlfriend, why are you on the phone with me?
Will: [silent]
Jack: Yeah. I thought so. You're my new best friend; call me every five seconds!

Karen: You say potato, I say vodka.

Jack: [High on coffee, and saying speedily] Hey, friends, lovers, mothers and other strangers, you are not going to believe what just happened to me... Oh, my God, did you just see that? I almost did a half nelson, I almost bruised my delicates, my delicates, my domo arigatos, Mr tomatoes. Huge News! I have met, are you ready for this, Mr Right, well, Mr Right Now. Good night, folks, I'm here all week, Jack 2000. He works at the Jumpin Java - you know, the coffee shop on seventy second and his name is Paul and he is cute with a capital Q! And the busier it gets, the hotter he gets, and the hotter he gets the sweatier he gets, and the sweatier he gets... I forgot where I'm goin with this, but the main point is me likey he and he likey me and the best part of schezam, he gives me free iced coffee every time I go in which is every hour on the hour, good nights, and occasionally on the half hour. Ba ba ba ba ba

Jack: So we need to get them back together, but how? Pretend to think, pretend to think.
Karen: Pretend to care, pretend to care.
Jack: Oh, I've got it. What we need is a plan. Some way to get them in the same room together.
Karen: Oh honey, that's genius, write that down. Oh, wait, not on that, that's for Will and Grace, that's an invitation to Joe and Larry's kid's birthday party.
Jack: Oh yeah, I got one of these too. Anyway, enough about that. We have to figure out a way to get them in the same room so they can work it out. But how? Ow, I just got a paper cut on this party invitation for Will and Grace.
Karen: Focus. We're trying to get them in the same room together. Forget about this party they're both invited to. Now, what do they both like?
Jack: Well, Will likes to be taller than everyone, and Grace likes to eat cake.
Karen: Where can we take them where there'll be small people eating cake?
[takes a sip of wine]
Karen: Oh, shoot, I just spilled on this invitation to a child's birthday party.
[pauses]
Karen: Hey, are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Jack: I don't know, are you thinking what it would be like to have Spiderman spray his web on you?
Karen: Okay that's just freaky.

Cher: Ya know dude, it is a little weird that you are talking to my doll.
Jack: Um I don't think that I need a drag queen to define normal behavior. But I will say this, the look, is flawless.
Cher: Whatever.
Jack: Ohh. Working the attitude. OK, you're good.
Cher: I've had a lot of practice.
Jack: Hey hey. You're not that great Mister Sister. I do a better Cher than you.
Cher: Ya think so?
Jack: Actually it's "You think so, hooooooooooooooe"
Cher: Are you kidding me with this?
Jack: OK, the hand is perfect, but it's more "are you kidding me with this, hoooooooooooe"
Cher: Get a life.
[walks away then turns around]
Cher: [sings] If I could turn back time.
Jack: [clears throat to sing] If I could turn back time, hoooooooooooe. Time hoooooooe. Time hoooooe. Time hoooooe.
Cher: [slaps Jack] Snap out of it!
[she leaves; Jack realizes who she really was and faints]

Karen: It's the oldest story in the book. Boy meets girl. Boy wants girl to do dominatrix film. Girls says, "Naked?" Boy says, "Yeah." Girl says, "No way." Boy says, "Okay how about you just wear this rubber dress and beat this old guy with a scrub brush?" Girl says, "How hard?"

[Karen is showing her breasts to a woman across the room]
Grace: Karen, what are you doing?
Karen: She started it.
Grace: Karen, she's breast feeding.
Karen: Oh... That would explain the little bald man.

Karen: Oh kids ruin everything. I mean look at the stitching on this. You cannot trust a ten year old to do a good hidden button.

[alright, I got a little carried away. But there are so many... I'll have to put up some more later.]

I bought an external hard drive [finally] and it's fantastic. It's portable, extremely small, holds 120gb and weighs less than a pound. It also works flawlessly with my mac. It's a sexy little device. That's all, just check it out if you're looking for some extra hard drive space.

buy.com $99.99

What's a guy to do when he's broke and in between long and short hair? Ok, not the most burning question, but it tugs at me nonetheless. It's sort of almost sexily bohemian to have shaggy, uncut hair.. I never do quite understand how some guys seem to keep their hair the same length consistantly. How often do they cut it anyway?
Last year I let mine grow, and grow, and grow.. just to see what it'd look like. Turns out my hair gets curly and big when it's long. Who knew. I may just grow it out again, if I have the patience to wait through the awkward in-between stage.
To help myself decide, I've posted these two strange pictures. I found some amusement in that curly-haired me is looking strangely at faux-hawk me [who happens to be singing OCU-style.] People, if you didn't already know, I'll tell you out front: I'm crazy!

Because Ellen Degeneres is the funniest person alive:

"In the beginning there was nothing. God said, 'Let there be light!' And there was light. There was still nothing, but you could see it a whole lot better.” - Ellen

“I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls. They always say because it's such a beautiful animal. There you go. I think my mother is attractive, but I have photographs of her.” - Ellen

“So, I bought a new cd and I was trying to get it open but couldn't with all the layers.. I mean plastic, and then tape - and the tape is like government tape. It says open here.. is that sarcasm? And buy batteries and they are in there with layers and layers of cardboard. And then scissors.. you need scissors to get into scissors. What if you were buying them for the first time? You wouldnt be able to get them open. Then you try and buy a light bulb and it's this thin thin cardboard.. What are they thinking?: "Ohh they'll be fine"?" - Ellen

“I was coming home from kindergarten - well they told me it was kindergarten. I found out later I had been working in a factory for ten years. It's good for a kid to know how to make gloves.” - Ellen

"We stock up on popcorn and candy like we're crossing the Sierras, don't we?: I'll have a couple of soft pretzals, a hot dog, milk duds, snocaps. Is that the largest popcorn you've got there - that bucket? You don't have a barrel or anything like that? Do you have a donkey or a pack mule or anything? - Oh, and a diet coke." - Ellen

"Our attention span is shot. We've all got Attention Deficit Disorder or ADD or OCD or one of these disorders with three letters because we don't have the time or patience to pronounce the entire disorder. That should be a disorder right there, TBD - too busy disorder... What's with this sudden choice of disorders we get right now? When I was a kid, we just had crazy people, that's it, just crazy people." - Ellen

I highly recommend watching and buying her stand-up DVDs if you haven't already. I just finished reading.. er, listening to her audio book "the funny thing is..." not because I don't like to read, but because I had a gift card for itunes and thought Ellen would be just the ticket. If you'll let me for a second, I'm going to endorse her and all her products. They're awesome. Buy them ALL. The DVDs, the books, the CDs. All of 'em people.

Welcome to my blog. I'm not quite sure what the point of this thing is, but I decided I wanted to start one and here it is. Since you're here, I'm guessing you want to know a little about me, so I'll just ramble on a bit and take care of that. My name is Andy, and I can describe myself best as a performer. I have many passions in life, but perhaps the one that drives me the most is that of communicating through the medium of the stage. I'm studying musical theatre at Oklahoma City University at the present, and it seems to be a promising beginning to an exciting and windy path.

I think a big part of a person's future is the people who inspire them, and at the risk of sounding like a groupie, for me I'd have to say that I look up most to Gavin Creel [stage performer/musician] and Ellen Degeneres [comedian extraordinaire]. I think they're both great artists, and have helped me find me, in some way or another. I'll have to post some funny Ellen quotes sometime soon. Anyway, enough of the groupie-ness. I'm an artist just like they are, and if I had an album or DVDs or books out, I'd say BUY THEM. So support my heros and you'll be a hero of mine. [Plus, when I DO have an album of my own, you better believe I'll be reminding you and everyone alive to buy at least eight copies each!/support].

Friends. I have a lot of talented friends, who mean a lot to me, and I think all have a great shot at sucessful careers - and I hope the best for them. As for me? I just want to eventually be in the city that never sleeps. Not because I am hellbent on being on Broadway. Not at all. I love New York - have since the first day I walked out of Port Authority [which I still don't think they have mopped since..] into the craziness of it all. Give me a closet with $1,500 rent and a pile of Ramen Noodles and I'll be happy. [Crazy, I know.] Give me a gig with a paycheck, and I'll be complete.